Are you a people pleaser? Do you feel like your cup is empty constantly because you are trying to fill everyone else’s first? Do you feel like getting the courage to stop people pleasing is harder than just continuing to drain yourself by pleasing others?
There is a reason on an airplane they tell you to take care of yourself and put your mask on first before you help anyone else. We can’t show up as our best selves for us or others if we are constantly people pleasing as our number one priority.
A lot of us people please to keep things peaceful or steady, to survive or to just simply fit in and feel liked. But in the end, it leaves us emotionally, mentally, and physically drained till we just hit a wall of complete burn out.
We put others needs before ours and instead of feeling like we are doing something good, we feel like we have been robbed.
People pleasing comes in many forms, never saying no, agreeing to do things you don’t want to, wanting others to like you, feeling like you’re taken advantage of, apologizing all the time, in order to have purpose you have to be needed, never having your own needs met, etc.
The list goes on and on. These are traits that cannot be sustained in the long run and will suck the life out of you.
There is nothing wrong with being kind and compassionate towards others but remember that it shouldn’t be at the cost of your happiness and health.
Start by creating boundaries in your life and starting to break your go to people pleasing habits. Start little by little recognizing when you are doing it and step back and evaluate an option that is better for you.
Learn to say no, and to say yes when its truly a yes. Carve out alone time for yourself, think about if it is really something you want to do or if it’s out of obligation, know why you are being kind and if the intention is a good one, make sure that your needs are met equally to meeting others, etc.
There are many ways to start to shift this mindset, just start with a couple small steps to help break this habit.
We need balance in our life to feel joy. You don’t want to look back and think you gave everything for everyone else and never took care of yourself. Drop the guilt and take action on putting you FIRST!
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